The Adventures of Truman and Fletcher- boy

I saw something on the news tonight about finding the last picture on your phone before the lockdown happened .    I found a video of Truman and myself walking to soccer practice on March 10th, one year ago today.    Mere days before all we knew was different.  The boys then started looking through pictures with me from last March on.    Lots of walks, snuggles and crafts.    They said things like “that was fun” and “you made that really cool”. As much as the last year has been hard (not shown in photos were the many tears and freak outs)and as much as I feel like I’ve failed over and over again.. I need to remember the perspective of these boys and know that it’s been ok.     ❤️ Looking through pictures is different than it was before.    Pictures from 2019 feel different from 2020.    2020 pictures automatically raise my heart rate.    Those pictures transport me back and clearly remind me of the early    days of the pandemic.    But in other ways, those 2020 pictures are blurry.   

How it started and how it’s going memes seem to be all the rage right now.  Heck I even shared a picture recently with this caption just to jump on the band wagon.  When I see them, I can't help but think of how this pandemic started for me and where I am almost a year later.  Right now year old memories pop up on my phone reminding me of dinners  out, no masks , school events, birthday parties and more.   These memories make me happy as I see our smiling faces, but it also makes me want to jump into those photos and prepare the people in them for the changes right around the corner.  How naïve I feel when I look back.  And how much anxiety I feel now for the me of a year ago.  She doesn't know what's coming, and wouldn't believe me if I could sneak back in time and tell her.  We’re weeks away from the anniversary of school cancellation, lockdowns and the change of life as we had previously known it.   Over the past few months I think I've blogged enough about how i