The Adventures of Truman and Fletcher- boy

I was on a call today and a word I kept hearing repeated was “grace”.  ( I think I uttered it a time or two myself). Have grace with yourself, your kids, our educators.  And it got me to thinking...  A few months ago my office shut down and I had to figure out my new work situation.  Where was I going to sit, how was I going to balance work and kids, what about my equipment, and so on and so forth .  And over the past few months I’ve adapted, acquired what I need, accepted ideas from others to make me more comfortable and generally just figured things out.  The luxury of time and privacy have been mine. And as our educators step in to the school year they’re doing the same thing.  Trying to figure out what works, how to adapt but with the scrutiny of kids, parents and peers.  I got to hide in my house in sweats and some days I still ended up in tears.  So teachers, I see you , I trust you and I support you as you try to figure this out with t...

 Fun fact about me: I hate roller coasters. Always have. Totally irrational fear. I feel like my feet are going to get cut off. The amusement park industry says its rides are safe, estimating the ​chances​ of being injured at one in 24 million. The chance of being killed at one in 750 million, according to the International Association of Amusement Parks and Attractions. The odds are pretty good there, but I don’t get on them. I hold on tight to the sense of control I have by standing on the ground watching others shriek with delight, or is that terror? You know what really stinks? Right now, my life feels like a roller coaster. Every day is filled with ups and downs, except this ride, ​“Life in a Pandemic​”, isn’t one I can sit out. So how does someone who longs to control things in her life handle the fact that so many things are outside of my control? How do I find joy when everywhere I look is bad news? How do I wake up each day, put a smile on my face and tackle the roller coa...

I last blogged about 10 months ago.. and am not sure that there will be enough space here to capture what life has been like the last 10 months.  After losing the baby last fall.. life went on, as it always does.  The Royals went on a historic run to the World Series, and we were there to see all of it. Truman had a blast, and I can only hope that those memories will be long lasting. The games were fun, but as I celebrated each win, I did so with feelings of emptiness and a good amount of guilt.  How could I be cheering, celebrating when just weeks before I had lost so much?  I was terribly conflicted... Work continued, runs continued, but all the while, it felt like there was something missing.  Until Thanksgiving. When we were able to give thanks for the gift that was growing inside of me. The first trip to the doctor was positive.. all the blood work looked good, as did the first few ultrasounds.. we were in business.  The first trimester passed easily...

3.120.2700.54. 9. All these numbers hold a meaning.  But let me start at the beginning, because they will make more sense that way. Estes Park, CO is a beautiful place.  It sits about 7500 feet above sea level, and on a good night,without the moon shining, you can see what seems like a million shooting stars.  So one August night, curled up in a blanket to shield myself from the cool mountain breeze, as a star fell across the sky, I shut my eyes tight, held my breath and I wished for another life to join our family.  I laughed off my wish as quickly as the star faded from the sky, because honestly as beautiful as the star streaming across the sky was, I knew that a wish is just that... a wish.  We had a great vacation, but by the end of the vacation the altitude was certainly getting to me.. and me me wonder.  Was it the altitude, or was it the magical shooting star flaming out across the sky carrying my wish with it?  And the day we got home from va...

Wow 2013....you really brought it.  From the really good, to the really bad, this year had it all.  I really felt as if I grew as a person, a mother, a boss and a friend.  So I'll try to recap, because let's be honest, my blogging was a bit hit or miss this year. We finally caught our breath after the holidays and the big move in December.  The routine we all so desperately craved returned and life was normal, at least our version of normal.  :)  The house, which was new and different, felt perfect...felt as if it was the place we always belonged.  The kitchen found itself humming as friends sat around the island sharing stories, laughs and even a few tears.  The first nicks found their way into the floors, dust started to settle into the corners and decor crept into rooms. And even the small, warm space in bed that once belonged to Skippy started to feel less empty as each morning a snuggly toddler filled it.  Life, like our house, slowly ...

Saying good bye to a loved one is funny, not ha-ha, but interesting in that you think you've said 'good-bye' but then another experience sneaks up on you.  Another time that you requires you to say 'good-bye'. This weekend I ran the Kansas City half-marathon, a race I had planned to run with my friends Andrea and Michelle.  Instead, on Saturday, Michelle and I ran...with an empty space between us, and an empty space in our heart.  We decided that instead of running for speed, we would just enjoy ourselves while we celebrated our friend.  So with a picture of her on our backs, that is exactly what we did.  We took our time:  we kissed our babies and high fived exuberant children, we commented on the beauty all around us, and we left a flower at every mile.  We held hands as we crossed the finish line, and kneeled down to leave a final rose at the finish.  We carried her with us for 13.1 miles and embraced each other as the emotion of the day over...

We went to the Royals game tonight...and you had a blast. You clapped, waved to the players, mowed through a pretzel and made friends with everyone sitting around us.  You and Dad even made it on tv( I guess I did too, but all you could see were my fingers holding the "I'm spending my 2nd birthday at the K" sign).  All in all...a pretty solid 2nd birthday.  It started to drizzle, and you were tired so we decided to head out.  We made it as far as the edge of the parking lot before your breathing settled into deep, slumbering breaths and your eye lids fluttered with dreams.  When we got home I carried you in to the house and enjoyed every second of you snoring on my shoulder.  As I changed you in to your pajamas, and took a second to snuggle you, I couldn't help but transport myself back two years ago.  This time 2 years ago, you were 8 hours old. I had only been blessed with the chance to hold you once, but once was all it took to get me hooked.  ...